Let's talk about it podcast: How to talk about puberty with your son

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Welcome to “Let's talk about it” podcast brought to you by Laaha
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Laaha is an open, online platform
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where women and girls can get information
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about their health, wellbeing, and safety
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Please remember
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All content provided on the platform is based on scientific knowledge
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for educational purposes only
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It is not intended to be a substitute
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for professional medical advice or treatment
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My name is Mariam
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and today, we’re diving into a topic that can feel both important and intimidating
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talking to your son about puberty
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Whether your child is just approaching these changes or already in the middle of them
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it’s never too late to have this conversation
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We’ll walk you through why it’s important
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how to get started, and what to say.
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Puberty is a major milestone in your child’s life
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marking a time of both physical and emotional change
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For boys, this stage usually begins between the ages of 9 and 14
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It's crucial to start these conversations early
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ideally around age 9
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so your son knows what to expect
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and understands that you’re a trusted source of information
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But what if your son has already started going through puberty
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and you haven’t had the talk yet?
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That’s okay
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The fact that you’re here now shows that you care
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and there’s still time to provide the support he needs
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Talking to your son about puberty can help him feel less alone and scared
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during this significant time of change
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We know this conversation can be tricky
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You might feel nervous or unprepare
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Esepicially since you will be discussing topic
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that aren’t usually talk about like genital body parts
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If you are a mother or female caregiver
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you might feel more uncomfortable to discussing male genital
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In some culture it might even be unusual
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orunacceptable for women to have this conversation with her son
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If that’s the case, consider asking a male relative, friend
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or another trusted individual to speak with your child
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But if you decide to take this on yourself or if you’re a single parent
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remember that with a bit of preparation you can handle this conversation confidently
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Now, let’s talk about some tips
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Here are some ways to make this conversation go smoothly
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Tip 1: Use Real Words
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It’s important for your son to know the correct names for their body parts
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including their genitals
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Using words like "penis" and "scrotum" instead other words
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sends the message that there’s nothing wrong or weird about these parts of their body
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If you haven’t been using these terms up until now
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it’s okay to start
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You might say something like
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“You know how we’ve been using the word ___? ”
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Well, really, it’s called a penis
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It’s important to use real words to talk about our bodies
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so that’s the word I’ll use from now on
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Tip 2: Have Short Talks Over Time
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Puberty is a complex subject that ties into other big topics like sex and sexuality
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You don’t have to and shouldn’t cover everything in one go
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Instead, think of this as an ongoing conversation
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Share a bit of information
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see how your son reacts
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and continue the discussion based on his questions and readiness
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Having regular conversations also normalize these topics
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and makes them easier to talk about
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Tip 3: It’s Okay Not to Know Everything
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If your son asks a question and you’re not sure how to answer
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that’s perfectly fine
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You can say “Hmm… good question”
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I love that you’re asking me what’s on your mind
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and I want to give you a thoughtful answer so let me think about it and come back to you soon
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Tip 4: Respond Without Judgment
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Your son might ask questions that seem funny or even shocking to you
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Try to answer as calmly as possible without judgment
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If he sees you’re comfortable
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he’ll feel more comfortable asking questions in the future
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Tip 5: Acknowledge Feelings and Provide Comfort
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Puberty can bring up a lot of emotions
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loss, fear, frustration, and even excitement
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It’s important to recognize and validate these feelings
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You might say
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“I wonder if you’re feeling X about this”
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That makes sense
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Even if you guess the wrong feeling
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it opens the door for him to share what he’s really feeling
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Now let get into some sample scripts that help you get started
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with the proper conversation
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First, introduce the conversation to your son
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you can say
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“I want to talk to you about something called puberty”
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Have you heard that word or know what it means?
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It’s totally fine if you haven’t or if you have
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After her responds you can say
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Puberty is a normal, healthy part of growing up
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It’s a stage when healthy body chemicals called ‘hormones’
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start to change your body and how it works and feels
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Some of these changes you’ll be able to see
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and some you can’t
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Here what you can say to Explain Emotional Changes
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Some changes in puberty you can see in your body
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and then there are other changes we can’t see
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but they’re still very real
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Those new body chemicals hormones
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can create changes in your feelings and emotions
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You may start to feel things more intensely
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and sometimes it might feel confusing or overwhelming
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If you start to feel this way it’s okay and it’s normal
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And I want you to know you can always talk to me
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Here are some script you can use to explain male anatomy changes
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you can start by saying
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Let’s talk about the changes that will happen in your body
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so they won’t be a surprise
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You might notice getting taller your voice getting deeper
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and your penis, scrotum and testicles getting larger
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you may notice hair growing around your penis
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under your arms, and on your face
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When the time is right
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we’ll talk about how to manage all that change
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You also wanna talk about him with erections
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you can say
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Penises are sometimes soft and sometimes hard
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There’s nothing wrong either way
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When they become hard, it’s just because extra blood is flowing there
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It can happen when you wake up
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when you pee, when you rub it or sometimes for no reason at all
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You also wanna talk to him about ejaculation
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you can say
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Your body will also start making something new called semen
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which is a white fluid that comes out of your penis
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and has little cells called sperm
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Sperm is one of the things needed to make a baby
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but it doesn’t mean you’re automatically ready to do that
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Or that you will
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It just means your body has the parts it needs
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if you choose to have a baby someday
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You can also talk to your son about wet dreams
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you could say
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You might have something called wet dreams
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which is when semen comes out of your penis while you’re sleeping
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This isn’t a problem
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and you haven’t done anything wrong
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it’s totally normal but it is a bit messy
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You’ll have to wash yourself and change your sheets
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I want you to know about this so you’re not worried or surprised
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or embarrassed when it happens
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and you can always talk to me about it and ask me for help
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to keep the conversation open and going with your son
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you can say
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Okay, I’m going to stop there
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We talked about some important things and we’ll continue these talks
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As your body changes
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it’s normal to have lots of feelings and worries
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I’ll check in with you from time to time
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Always know you can come to me with any feelings or questions
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I’ll never be mad, shocked, or think you have a bad question.
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I love you very much
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Okay so now you have some tips to get started
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and also some sample script that you can use
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and adapt to have these conversation with your son about puberty
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Remember, these conversations are opportunities
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to connect with your son and deepen your relationship
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It may feel uncomfortable at first but by addressing these topics
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you’re showing him that you can handle discomfort
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that you’re a reliable source of information
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and that he can come to you with any questions or concerns